“I simply walk into Mordor”

I simply Walk into Mordor

Having traveled Middle Earth more than I would have liked and seen a number of strange and terrifying things, I have taken the task upon myself to pen for you; dear readers, a guide that will hopefully keep you from falling into the same misfortune that I found myself in.

First things first, you will need a reason for your quest. A quest is a journey with a goal and if there is no reason to go questing, it is merely a holiday. Albeit a perhaps unpleasant one at times. I do not believe that all of you will be going to destroy a powerful ring or slaying a dragon to take back your mountain of treasure, but a quest can be anything so get creative.


Next, it will be good to have a group of companions to journey with you. Especially if you are a Hobbit like myself and have no background with a sword. I would consider you very lucky in your quest if you didn’t run into trouble of some kind. This is why I suggest a fellowship of your closest friends and those with good skill. Nine appears to be a good number for this, but should that fail one close friend will do the job. Quests are dangerous and many times you will desire to tun back. Should this situation arise, look to your faithful friend to build up your courage and help you carry on. Good friends are hard to come by, so make sure you have the best.

the fellowship

Now, it would also be helpful to have a wizard. But as there aren’t many of those around anymore, you might not be able to accomplish this one. But they do come in handy in times of trouble, especially when there is dark magic at play. However, the one I have made acquaintance of has a nasty habit of pulling us Bagginses into trouble we didn’t sign up for. So do be careful.

Lastly, have something of Elvish origin. The Elves have many magical artifacts and if you can acquire an Elvish cloak, sword, of some rope, you will be very well off. Also, Mithril is a life saver (quite literally) so if you can find some in a dragon hoard or troll cave, by all means take it.

That is all the advice I can think of for now. Whatever your business and whatever the outcome, do take care!


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